“Listen – you’re sad and mildly insufferable. Do you have any idea how big of a base that covers?”

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This book is difficult to love and impossible not to.

The self-deprecating, faux-narcissistic, depressive, dark humour is just too – sorry Zoe, I’m going to say it – relatable.

The 2023 Russ Manning Most Promising Newcomer Award winning cartoonist, Zoe Thorogood (writer and artist of The Impending Blindness of Billie Scott, artist on Joe Hill’s Rain graphic novelisation), records six months of her own life as it falls apart in a desperate attempt to put it back together again in the only way she knows how. It’s Lonely at the Centre of the Earth is an intimate and meta-narrative look into the life of a selfish artist who must create for her own survival. A poignant and original depiction of a young woman’s struggle with mental health—through the ups and downs of anxiety, depression, and imposter syndrome—as she forges a promising career in sequential art and finds herself along the way.

Image Comics

For those like me – especially fellow creatives – who have lived experience of mental illness, this ‘auto-bio-graphic-novel’ is a must-read.

I say this with the caveat that the author pulls no punches in her depiction of the depths of mental illness. In fact, she includes her own content warning:

“This book includes personal discussion and depiction of suicide and self-harm. While I hope this book may serve as a comfort to some, its content may be triggering. Make sure you are in a comfortable place before reading, and remember that the sun always rises on a new day. Thank you.”

Zoe Thorogood

The vibe is kind of like Ferris Bueller’s Day Off if Cameron was the main character. Except instead of destroying his dad’s car, he gets an STD and a broken heart.

I love how Zoe experiments with different styles throughout the book. The story flows seamlessly, despite the staccato changes in colour, layout, form, etc. It’s a great representation of the bumpy spiral-turned-whirlwind of mental illness.

That search for meaning, purpose, and identity; the horror of being perceived and the fear of disappearing entirely; simultaneously craving and recoiling from connection and the subsequent vulnerability.

The fact that Zoe manages to inject humour into this undeniably depressing book is a credit to her skill as an artist. To make me as the reader feel like I wanted to laugh, cry, write a poem, and punch myself in the face all at the same time is quite an achievement.

This isn’t the kind of A-to-B, linear, formulaic mental illness story where the protagonist goes from sad to happy, running off into the sunset with a grateful wave to their trauma for all the “good lessons”.

There is disappointment. There are failures. There is self-sabotage and unanswered questions and the author doesn’t tie up all the loose ends with a neat bow. It’s messy. It’s ambiguous. It’s real.

“… maybe life is just about those good fuckin’ sandwiches.”

Zoe Thorogood

I mean, she’s not wrong. I do love a good sandwich.

Goodreads rating: ★★★★★

I received a free copy of this book from the publisher, Image Comics, via NetGalley, for review purposes.

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